Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Thanksgiving Dinner - Keep it Simple

Let me preface this by saying this has absolutely nothing to do with fantasy football but has everything to do with Thanksgiving and the food we all love so much.

I am going over to my wife's sisters house for Thanksgiving this year and they are having a ton of family over for dinner....I have no idea how many people are coming, but it's gonna look like a food drive outside trailor park. There is going to be so much food there the garbage truck is going to have to make a separate run just for this one house. There's one thing you can guarantee about this gathering...that there will be way too many different kinds of food. The kinds of food only scientists in yellow suits should be experimenting with. All I need is some juicy turkey with some good old fashioned dressing and some delicious gravy and a roll to sop up the gravy with. What I will undoubtedly find is a variety of food combinations ...foods that were never meant to go together. For example, one year I went to a friends house for Thanksgiving and there were prunes and nuts in the dressing and vegetables inside the rolls. Maybe they put the prunes in the dressing to make the family more regular after dinner? It's like this every year...some relative has to make a few dishes that has green beans and peanut butter and yogurt and pumpkin in it. And you know who made it because they are the first one to say, "Wes did you try the marshmallow, chip pea gravy, with the fresh shrimp garnish?" and what I want to say is....No, that's why the pan is still full !!! Why do relatives do this to us?....All we guys want are the staples and maybe one special dish we may get once or twice a year, everyone has their favorites...but why do we need like 5 extra dishes...do we want our plates covered in all these small spoon sized portions of different recipe's that would make that guy from Bizarre Foods gag? Let me break this down for you Thanksgiving hosts out there...Turkey, Dressing, Mashed Potatoes, Gravy and a roll...add in a special dish...maybe green bean casserole if you like that kinda thing or some special salad...but leave it at that. This will lesson the awkward moment of asking us if we tried something we were trying to avoid...it will shorten the bathroom line after dinner and allow all us guys to grub on the things we love the most and hit desert table without wondering how long it will take til we get the runs from grandma's peach spice pheasant livers...just because you can doctor it enough so you can stomach it...doesn't mean you should eat it.


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